California
Is what I say in custody mediation confidential in California?
Quick answer
Mostly, yes. Family Code section 3177 makes court custody mediation private and confidential, but if your court uses child custody recommending counseling, the counselor may give the judge a written recommendation, so what you say can shape what the judge reads. Court mediation services must provide a written description of the limits on confidentiality.
Researched by Dan Martin, Legal Researcher · Published by Onbello Legal · Last updated October 2026
What the law says
Family Code section 3177: “Mediation proceedings pursuant to this chapter shall be held in private and shall be confidential. All communications, verbal or written, from the parties to the mediator made in the proceeding are official information within the meaning of Section 1040 of the Evidence Code.”
Section 3183(a) lets the mediator, “consistent with local court rules,” submit a recommendation on custody or visitation to the court, after first giving the parties the recommendation in writing before the hearing. That process is called child custody recommending counseling. Under section 3183(c), the mediator may also recommend restraining orders in appropriate cases.
The general mediation confidentiality rules in the Evidence Code do not cover court custody mediation. Evidence Code section 1117(b)(1) says that chapter does not apply to a proceeding under Chapter 11 of Part 2 of Division 8 of the Family Code, the custody mediation chapter. California Rules of Court, rule 5.210(d)(1)(G) requires each court to ensure that its mediation services “provide a written description of limitations on the confidentiality of the process,” and rule 5.210(e)(2)(B) requires the orientation to cover those limits.
What to do next
Find out which kind of session you have before you go. FL-300-INFO says some clerks fill in your appointment at item 6 of the FL-300, while other courts require you to make it first. Read FL-314-INFO if your court uses mediation or FL-313-INFO if it uses recommending counseling, and ask family court services for its written description of confidentiality limits. If you are concerned about meeting with the other parent, FL-314-INFO says you may ask to meet alone with the mediator.
Last checked against the sources above on October 6, 2026.
Need to file before mediation?
Our guided tool prepares your Request for Order and custody attachments so your proposed schedule is in writing before your session.
Join the waitlist ($129 at launch)Where to check this
Forms, deadlines, and local rules change. Verify anything on this page against the official self-help resources for your state before you rely on it.
This page is general legal information, not legal advice, and does not create an attorney–client relationship. Laws and local rules vary and change. For advice about your situation, consult a licensed family-law attorney in your state.
Get the California custody checklist
Two pages: what to gather, which forms, deadlines, what to bring to the hearing. Free, no account.