How Papers Are Served in a New Jersey Custody Case

FD cases: the court mails the papers

Under the service by mail program in R. 5:4-4(b), the Family Part mails all documents filed by the parties in a summary action, including the complaint, counterclaim, applications, cross applications and supporting financial statements, simultaneously by certified and ordinary mail to the address the filing party provides. That is why the FD kits stress giving the court the other party’s most recent address: the court sends the Notice to Appear and your papers there.

• When mail service works. Service by mail has the same effect as personal service unless there is no proof the certified mail was received, either mailing comes back marked with a non-delivery notation such as “moved, unable to forward” or “addressee not known,” or the court has other reason to believe service was not made (R. 5:4-4(b)(2)).
• When it does not. If service cannot be made by mail or other permitted means, the court dismisses the complaint or application without prejudice, subject to reinstatement as of the original filing date once service is made (R. 5:4-4(b)(3)).
• Defaults. For initial complaints, no order is entered by default until an affidavit or certification of non-military service is provided (R. 5:4-4(b)(4)). The Judiciary lists the Certification of Non-Military Service among the forms for custody, parenting time or visitation requests.

When you cannot find the other parent

If the other party cannot be located, the filing party must give the last known home address and show, through diligent inquiry, that no current address is known; the court may then proceed on that affidavit or certification (R. 5:4-4(c)). The rule says the inquiry should include, as appropriate, relatives and last known employers, the U.S. Postal Service, the New Jersey Motor Vehicle Commission or the motor vehicle agency where the person last lived, and the U.S. Department of Defense.

The Judiciary’s Certification of Diligent Search (CN 11490) (revised 03/2024) includes sample letters and forms. You return the certification with copies of every letter or form you sent and any responses, and if you skip a listed location you must explain why. The court’s self-help page notes that if you are asking for child support, the county welfare office can help locate the other parent.

FM cases: serving a divorce complaint

In civil family actions other than summary actions, the summons follows R. 4:4-2 and is served under R. 4:4 (R. 5:4-1(a)). The primary method within New Jersey is personal service: delivering the summons and complaint to the defendant personally, or leaving them at the defendant’s home with a competent household member aged 14 or older who lives there, or delivering them to an authorized agent (R. 4:4-4(a)(1)).

• Optional mailed service. Service may instead be made by registered, certified or ordinary mail, but it is effective only if the defendant answers or otherwise appears, and no default may be entered on it. If the defendant does not answer or appear within 60 days, service must be made another way (R. 4:4-4(c)).
• Substituted service. If an affidavit shows that personal service cannot be made despite diligent effort, the rule allows personal service out of state, or simultaneous certified and ordinary mail to the defendant’s home, among other methods (R. 4:4-4(b)(1)).
• Acknowledgment. A general appearance, or an acceptance of service signed by the defendant’s attorney or signed and acknowledged by the defendant, has the same effect as proper service (R. 4:4-6).

Serving motions and later papers

Papers after the initial pleading are served on a party under R. 4:4-4, or by certified or registered mail, return receipt requested, and simultaneously by ordinary mail to the party’s last known address (R. 1:5-2). For post-judgment FM motions, the timing in R. 5:5-4(c) runs from the return date: motions at least 24 days before, opposition and cross-motions at least 15 days before, and replies at least 8 days before, with 3 days added for service by mail. Two copies of all motion papers are served.

The Judiciary’s post-judgment instructions list certified or regular mail, a process server or courier, an adult neutral third party, or delivery by you as ways to serve the packet, and say you must be able to prove in court that you delivered it. If you serve by mail, the packet itself says to use both regular and certified mail, return receipt requested, which matches R. 1:5-2. If you deliver the papers yourself, the packet requires the other party’s notarized Acknowledgment of Personal Service (Form H). The packet includes a Certification of Filing and Service (Form D).

Primary sources

Rules and forms change. Check the current version at the source before you file. New Jersey statutes are published by the Legislature, and the Rules Governing the Courts by the Judiciary. Neither site offers a stable link to a single section, so statute and Court Rule links open the official search page; search there for the citation shown.

• R. 5:4-4, service of process in Family Part summary actions
• R. 5:4-1, process
• R. 4:4-4, summons, personal and substituted service
• R. 4:4-6, general appearance and acknowledgment of service
• R. 1:5-2, manner of service of papers
• R. 5:5-4(c), time for service of motions
• CN 11490, Certification of Diligent Search
• CN 11191, Certification of Non-Military Service
• NJ Courts, steps for filing a post-judgment motion