Custody Mediation in North Carolina

Mediation is set by statute

Whenever it appears that a case involves a contested issue of custody or visitation, the matter shall be set for mediation of the unresolved issues before or concurrent with the setting of the matter for hearing, where there is a program established under G.S. 7A-494, unless the court waives mediation (G.S. 50-13.1(b)). This applies to issues raised in motions to modify as well as in original pleadings. Custody or visitation issues raised in contempt or show cause motions may be set for mediation. Alimony, child support, and other economic issues may not be referred to this program.

G.S. 7A-494 directs the Administrative Office of the Courts to run the program statewide through local district programs. Mediators must have at least a master’s degree in psychology, social work, family counseling, or a comparable field, at least 40 hours of mediation training, and training and experience in child development or family dynamics (G.S. 7A-494(c)).

How the program works

The Judicial Branch describes the steps this way:

1. Sign up. A custody case must be filed first. The sign-up process varies by county. If someone else filed against you, you should receive information about your orientation class in the mail.
2. Orientation. A group class that prepares parents for mediation, usually scheduled within 30 days of the date the case is sent to the program. You do not have to talk to the other parent there.
3. The mediation session. One session of up to two hours, with a further session at the mediator’s discretion if the parties agree. Attorneys do not attend sessions in the court program.

According to the Judicial Branch, the program is free of charge. The mediator does not decide who is right and makes no decisions about custody. Mediation is about agreeing on a plan, so you do not need to bring evidence.

Confidentiality

• Mediation is held in private and is confidential. Except as the statute provides, communications to the mediator or between the parties in the mediator’s presence are absolutely privileged and inadmissible in court (G.S. 50-13.1(e)).
• Neither the mediator nor any party is competent to testify about those communications, but there is no privilege for communications in furtherance of a crime or fraud, and child abuse reporting duties still apply (G.S. 50-13.1(f)).
• The mediator may assess the needs and interests of the child and may interview the child or others who are not parties when the mediator thinks it appropriate (G.S. 50-13.1(e)).

Asking to waive mediation

For good cause, on either party’s motion or its own, the court may waive mediation (G.S. 50-13.1(c)). Good cause may include, but is not limited to:

• undue hardship to a party;
• an agreement to use voluntary mediation, subject to court approval;
• allegations of abuse or neglect of the child;
• allegations of alcoholism, drug abuse, or domestic violence between the parents;
• allegations of severe psychological, psychiatric, or emotional problems; and
• a showing that the party lives more than fifty miles from the court, which may be considered good cause.

Waiver is not automatic. The statewide form is the AOC-CV-632, Motion and Order to Waive Custody Mediation (New 4/99), which tells the movant they will have to appear in court and offer evidence to support the reasons checked. Either party may also move to dismiss the mediation and have the case heard in court because of the mediator’s bias, undue familiarity with a party, or other prejudicial ground (G.S. 50-13.1(d)).

If you reach an agreement

Any agreement must be put in writing, signed by each party, and submitted to the court as soon as practicable. Unless the court finds good reason not to, it shall incorporate the agreement in a court order, which then becomes enforceable as a court order (G.S. 50-13.1(g)). A parenting agreement incorporated in an order is treated as a custody order or child custody determination under Chapter 50A and other statutes (G.S. 50-13.1(h)). The statewide order form is the AOC-CV-631, Order Approving Parenting Agreement (Rev. 5/26).

If you do not agree

If some or all custody issues are not resolved, the mediator reports that to the court (G.S. 50-13.1(g)), and one of the parties will need to schedule the case for trial. Local district rules set how and when unresolved cases are calendared.

Parenting coordinators are different

A parenting coordinator is not a mediator. In a high-conflict case, a judge may appoint one after a custody order is entered to help the parents comply with it and to decide issues within the authority the order gives them (G.S. 50-91 and 50-92). See the enforcement guide.

Primary sources

Statutes, rules, and forms change. Check the current version at the source before you file.

• G.S. 50-13.1, custody mediation
• G.S. 7A-494, Custody and Visitation Mediation Program
• G.S. 50-91 and 50-92, parenting coordinators
• AOC-CV-632, Motion and Order to Waive Custody Mediation
• AOC-CV-631, Order Approving Parenting Agreement
• North Carolina Judicial Branch, Custody Mediation help topic
• North Carolina Judicial Branch, Child Custody and Visitation Mediation Program
• North Carolina Judicial Branch, local rules and forms